Good can come from the storm.... you just have to ride the wave!

As weather men and women on the morning news shows talk about the storm that is Sandy, I can't help but notice the tape rolling in the background.  It's mostly surfers and body/boogie boarders waiting for the next big wave caused by the huge storm that's coming their way.  That's what they do during a storm.  They wait for the biggest and baddest wave so they can ride it out to perfection.  If you watch surfers (especially the newbies), you see them wipe out and nearly drown with arms flailing about. Some of the more experienced surfers, however,  will take a proper stance, wait for the wave to come --with total disregard for any harm it could cause---and take it on.  I call them nuts and wonder how in the world they think it's good sense to be out and about in the middle of a storm riding a wave.  This morning, it occurred to me that there might be something to it.  When a storm is brewing and getting really bad (read, when life is happening and things get hard), maybe I should do less retreating and feeling sorry for myself and questioning of God and do more stance taking, more patient waiting and more riding out of the wave.  We've heard many of the gospel songs of old that suggest trouble don't last always, or joy comes in the morning, or holding out until a change comes.   A favorite of mine is when the preacher tells the story about the girl and her dad driving in the storm and cars are pulling over and 18 wheelers are pulling over and it's raining harder and harder and the girl can't see and she asks her dad what they should do.  He says "just keep driving".  After several times of telling her that, they finally make it out of the storm.  He then tells her to pull over and look back at all the people who stopped or pulled over before the storm was over.  There is good (and God) in the storm.  It never seems so or feels like it at the time, but there are so many things happening at once and quite frankly, we can't begin to understand it all.  TRUST GOD.

Proverbs 3:5
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding...

Even when you think you have the answer and especially when you realize you don't...Take a stance, wait (or do the work) patiently, and ride the storm to perfection. 

EXPECT MORE THAN YOU COULD EVER THINK OR IMAGINE

Wasting away and being renewed all at once...WOW!

Therefore, we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. (2 Corinthians 4:16)

I'm looking at Grace at play in the backyard making dirt pies, and I just feel overwhelmed with emotions. It's probably not a big help that my DVR'ed episode of Parenthood is filled with opportunities to be emotional. One of the main characters recently found out she has breast cancer and her daughter comes home from college and it's a surprise visit because the daughter wanted to be with her family after hearing the news and the whole family is all together and she tells them and....well anyway....you see how one might start to think about life. So, I'm often glad that Grace plays so well by herself seeing as how she's not going to have any siblings close to her age. Then, there are times that I feel guilty about it; not that she plays well by herself, but that she's not going to have any siblings close to her age. I mean, I COULD have another baby (physically), and some days I think it would be a great idea. But, most days, I'm certain that I'm, what I like to call, "one and done". Oddly enough, the topic of another baby is not exactly what this entry was about. I started out thinking about the things that make me laugh and smile and cry and...feel. There have to be those (these) moments of introspection in order to move. Then I started to think about where I'd like to move to; metaphysically as opposed to a physical move. Will I go back to tv news? What do I really want to do as a writer/blogger/journalist/marriage advocate/Christ child? When and where will Grace go to preschool? Why is going to preschool such a big deal? I mean, I didn't go to school until I started kindergarten, and I believe I 'm okay:o) I'm on the journey. No, really, I'm on a multidimensional path to change. It's a six week transformation process that my sister's church is undergoing in Atlanta through the vision of her pastor. I'm living vicariously through her and doing a version of it as well. It's supposed to change my life. CHANGE MY LIFE. That's a tall order, AND my life is fine...Right? I'm sure this isn't over...the feeling and thinking on what is right and pure and lovely and admirable. In order to get to those things, I have to get through some of my junk first. Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief.

EXPECT MORE THAN YOU COULD EVER THINK OR IMAGINE

Be A Truth Teller....It's Hard, It Hurts...(now the good news)...It Heals

I hear the little foot steps coming up the stairs just as I'm on my way down to see why it was so quiet down there.  "I broke it", Grace says to me.  I asked her what she broke and to show it to me.  She takes my hand and leads me down the stairs to the office/workout space.  I look around and can find nothing that's obviously broken.  By this time, she's pulled me over to the desk chair and pulls the round knob in the back that is used to adjust the chair.  As soon as she touches it, it falls down; I suppose she'd actually tried to fix it before coming to me with the truth.  I pick it up, and she says, "can you fix it".  I tell her that we can, and I begin to screw the knob back into the hole in the center of the chair.  I think it took all of 2 minutes (if that) for me to fix it.  I tell her it's fixed, she touches it (I guess just to make sure) and says "thank you".  Now,she's come to me before to say she needs help with something or to say she'd broken something that really wasn't broken.  But for some reason it affected me differently this last time.  I started thinking about how I live my life and whether or not it would be better, easier ( in the long run), more fulfilling if I was that honest with God. 

*It's broken (a relationship, an opportunity, my promise, my will, my trust, my desire to follow you faithfully)
*Can you fix it? (I don't want to remain in this place, and I need your help)
*Thank you (an acknowledgement of the fixing that's taken place and gratefulness for that)

Psalm 25:5 Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long.

Ephesians 4:25 Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another.

The first scripture is a reminder that God is the standard bearer of truth, and when in doubt, it's His truth I seek.

The second one encourages me to walk in and speak truth with myself, my husband, family and friends. 

Lord I believe, help my unbelief.

EXPECT MORE THAN YOU COULD EVER THINK OR IMAGINE

Run YOUR Race Or You'll Fall Off the Treadmill...Almost Literally:o)

Out of breath and nearly out of gas on the treadmill Monday morning, I was running at a 5.3 pace; even getting as high as 5.7 at my "I'm almost done" push at the end of my 45 minutes.  Well, at about mile marker 3 this petite woman, who probably weighs only 120 pounds soaking wet, gets on the treadmill next to mine.  I'd already (stereotypically, I'm sad to say) surmised that she was a RUNNER.  She was lean, had solid calf and thigh muscles, and wore some little runner shorts and a dri-fit shirt...all dead giveaways.  At any rate, she gets on the machine, does some stretching and starts RUNNING.  I mean, the lady was running...FAST.  Per my routine, I take a break at the end of each mile so I can get a sip of water, catch my breath and not die on the treadmill :o) While on my mile 3 break, I look over at this chick and see her pace set at 7.0 (EYES OPEN WIDE....GASP).  Who does that?!  For a few seconds, I felt a bit outdone...put out even. I was there first and she saw my pace, so why would she do that to me (I know...stop being a victim, right).   I mean, I was feeling really good about my pace.  Monday is a good run day because I'm coming off of a good two days of rest.  Needless to say, this break lasted a little longer than normal.  I was rethinking my game plan.  Should I increase my speed and tire myself out (on a Monday) to the point that I might not be able to run anymore this week?  Should I go ahead and finish up so as not to be embarrassed for running so slowly next to this machine of a woman?  Should I....NO....I should run the race I started and finish it (MY RACE) strongly.  A friend of mine used to always say, "comparison is the thief of joy".  If never before, it made sense today.  I was easily sidetracked because someone was doing what I considered to be a better job than me.  The reality is that comparing myself to that woman was like comparing apples and oranges, as they say.  We were doing the same thing, but that wasn't criteria enough to suggest that we should be doing it at the same pace or on the same level.  A LESSON TO BE LEARNED FOR SURE.  Hers was not my race to run.  So, in that revelation, I ended the break and started to my finish.  Another mile and 11 minutes later, I was done and back to feeling good about my accomplishment.

 Keep moving, run your race (on or off the treadmill), don't compare yourself to others because you are good enough and finish strong!  

EXPECT MORE THAN YOU COULD EVER THINK OR IMAGINE!