#Myfavoritegirl

#Myfavoritegirl
Just Growing Up Beautifully!

Grateful

Grateful
Celebrating my niece's marriage

Big Papa

Big Papa
We don't need no stinkin' snow plow!

#Family

#Family
A family that plays (in the snow) together!

Family

Family
FAMU I LOVE THEE

NYC trip with the girls!

NYC trip with the girls!
Sisters and Friends

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Could a step back from technology really be a couple of steps forward?

I deactivated my Facebook page! I know...no more FB...why....for how long...what will you do with all that time you used to spend on FB? I'm sure these are some of the questions that popped into your head. They're questions I'm asking myself actually. In all honesty, I've been thinking about doing this for a while (maybe since the beginning of the year). As my "friends" list began to grow, it occurred to me that I hadn't seen, talked to or even thought about many of the people that I was now letting into my world, my personal space. I was sharing the special occasions in my life, my thoughts, the growing up of my daughter...and I was doing all of this with "virtual" strangers. Don't get me wrong, on the flip side, I was able to see into people's lives and have "shared" experiences with them without actual interaction. Maybe I opened my world up to too many "friends". I probably would have been better served by keeping my circle small and intimate. The funny thing about that is I have less than 200 "friends", of whom I'm certain only a handful have even noticed that I no longer exist on FB, and that number IS small for a FB roster. With all of that going on in my head, it didn't help that I recently watched "The Social Network". It's the movie based on Mark Zuckerberg and the founding of Facebook. Now, I'm not certain how much of the movie was fact versus Hollywood, but I was put off by Zuckerberg's character and the the way it all went down. I've had the discussion with some as to whether or not I am being oversensitive to the way he was handling business and how he was a genius who was just in his own head all the time and how the twins who sued him were the real jerks of the movie. I've even heard that Zuckerberg says he isn't really like his character in the movie. I get it... and I'm probably being ridiculous seeing as how I'd stop using a lot of goods and services if I saw a movie about they way they came to be. Nevertheless, I was feeling a certain way about this particular thing and ,just for now, took action. To reactivate my page is as simple as logging into my FB account with my email address and password. They make it very easy to return to my "friends". In the meantime, I have the phone numbers and addresses, both physical and virtual, for the "friends" I actually want to access and vice versa. I guess I'll have to spend more time reading or writing or playing with Grace or surfing the internet for other favorite pages to visit. I'll also have to find another way to distribute this post...as FB made it easy to publish for all my "friends" to read. Given all that, I still have to wonder if my step back from that piece of technology and social networking won't somehow be a couple of steps forward for ME in the long run. Only time will tell. So, until I return to FB, call me, email me or send me a letter...."friends". I'll miss you while I'm gone.

2 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. Of course you know I have typed and deleted this post multiple times in an attempt to look for the most appropriate frame for my response. However when I sat still long enough to hear my own heart, I was able to acknowledge that although I am communicating in a public forum, I am responding to a friend and I needed no introduction, no staging and/or prefacing!!

    I remember each time totaling three to date that I have deactivated my FaceBook page. The first was out of frustration with the whole pseudo-friendship environment that in my mind at the time, that FB had created in my life. However the, “FB disconnection” didn’t last very long; after some prompting by a few FB friends I quickly reactivated the account within a few hours.

    At least two more times following that episode for similar reasons I deactivated that same account. Ironically, during last episode, "Deactivation #3” a call was made on a news forum for all FB users to “de-friend” those persons who they really didn’t know and who are not true friends. EUREKA, this was my sign; I am moving in the right direction!! In fact the statement that candidly struck a balance for me was, "FB friending has devalued true friendships." I chose the phrase, “struck a balance” because it was the unrest, the unbalance and the disagreement with my spirit that fostered my fixation on this issue. Of course, the initial elation that resulted from this sudden revelation propelled me to act immediately!!! Within seconds, I was trapped in a “de-friending frenzy” after about 20 minutes I had dropped from 500 to under 200 FB friends!! I felt lighter, safer and more importantly I felt more authentic!! So at that point I created parameters for myself, “I will not go over 200 FB friends again.” However true to form, my spirit did not remain rested and I still take issue with my FB friend list. As I look over that list right now which has creeped back up, now totaling 240 FB friends with at least 15 persons sitting in the "friend request" queue; I am once again totally disgusted by the fact, that "I (not FB) am devaluing those persons "who are hard to find and lucky to have", the persons, "who are like the siblings God forgot to give us", the persons, " who are honored to walk beside us through life, not racing ahead in an effort to outshine/one-up you or lag behind due to a need or desire to ride one’s coat tails", the persons, "whom even when you can't see or hear them they are always there, for they are in our hearts! More importantly, the friendships where there is NO DOUBT that the relationships are reciprocal in value, effort and respect!

    I am not sure how long you have had your FB thoughts, but as I spoke with you somewhat hurriedly on Thursday; I wanted to share with you that I was ruminating on yet again my place in the FB/SN world!! I have made a decision, based on formal and personal research and I am rectifying my FB/SN friend affairs today! Thanks for sharing and allowing me to share!!!

    ReplyDelete

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